My First Rant...

Does it make anyone else crazy when someone asks "how are you?" and then doesn't wait for a response? Even when they actually pause for you to say something in return, 90% of people don't really want to know how you are. All they expect is a pro forma "fine". That part isn't actually a problem for me, as I probably don't want to tell them the intimate details of my life, but now I can't even tell when I'm supposed to say anything at all! Sometimes "how are you?" is used interchangeably with "hi", and the speaker looks at you like you're a freak if you answer their question.
My usual response is "I'm well- and yourself?" Once they get over the surprise of my having answered they usually say "good." I hadn't really thought about that until one day a customer overheard one of these exchanges and praised me for saying well as opposed to good. The meanings really are distinct, and the customer was correct: the word does not mean what they think it means. Such a common problem these days. That being said, I would love to have somone ask me how I am and respond with "Evil, thanks, and you?"
Why don't we just do away with this whole exchange? I'm not saying you can't ask me how I am if you care about me or my answer. I'm happy to have a real conversation with people who are interested (And preferably interesting). If its just a placeholder in your speech, though, just say "hi", or "good morning". That way you won't inadvertently offend me (why are you asking? If I said anything other than fine, you'd be uncomfortable), you won't have to listen to me give you an honest answer to that question ("I'm filled with self loathing due to my inability to maintain a healthy diet or do anything to halt genocide around the world"), and you won't respond with something inappropriate or inaccurate (like "good")and earn my contempt.
Maybe this is why I get so irritable so often: I start picking apart every conversation before its even begun. Still, some manners wouldn't kill people.

Up Next: cell phones, and why I think they are works of evil...you know, the bad kind of evil.

Not much of a beginning, but its something.